Increase your emotional intelligence (fifth part)

Being emotionally intelligent improving our social relationships and prevents problems with stress, anxiety and depression.

First I want to congratulate you for the work you are carrying out with yourselves because you are seeing and going to see more and more benefits of this program. This week is the penultimate phase of self-observation. We want to fix how we act in difficult times and use strategies to handle negative emotions. The most typical strategy we usually apply if we have not received any training in handling emotions is distraction. That is if I feel stressed, worried, angry etc.. I try to do something to avoid having to continue to feel that emotion.

Typical distractions:related image

Watch TV

Arguing with my partner / children


Do sport


Eating (especially food high in fat or sugar)

Drinking alcohol or taking other medication or drug


These strategies not only do not solve the problem but depending on the strategy of distraction use, I can have serious physical and / or mental health long term.

This week we observe if we apply distraction when we feel negative emotions and which distraction strategies are our favorites.

We will continue with self-observation at critical moments, this means always if we notice a change in moodExercise result image from happy / sad neutral / fearful / angry etc. .

We ask ourselvess

"What am I feeling right now?”

We redefine the excitement / emotions present at this time, identify the part of our body, where we feel the emotion asking:

"What part of my body feels" that emotion "?

and we care about our thoughts wondering:

What I think / what I just thought?” always trying to put ourselves in the position of an observer without trial does not want nor can intervene, only observes.

And now we look at our behavior by asking: ” What do I do / What I like to do?”

Record your observations.

If you feel trapped or notes a constant presence of negative emotions like sadness anger an fear in a high measure during the obseravation, ontact me or other professional who can help you get to know the underlying causes.

There will be moments of low motivation and thoughts about leaving the program. Do not Let convinced by these thoughts, are patterns that work against change, to maintain the current status and stay in the comfort zone.

Greetings and hope you are you benefiting from the articles and exercises.

Melanie Gramer

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