Fear management (NO- method 3)
In this article I want to talk about fear and its derivatives such as anxiety, lack of assurance, stress, unrest, the scare, panic etc.. They have an important role in our lives. The role of fear is to ensure our survival. That is why our mind pay attention to that emotion, when it is present, and divert attention from other tasks that we are carrying out in this moment. However, we are glad when a moment of acute panic let us survive. And unless it seems necessary when fear limits us in our professional or private life because we dare not say what is necessary for our boss or our partner, because we care very much about what our children do when we can not see them and we fear to fear when the excitement is over and it begins to limit in almost any area of our life.
Fear is a tool that seeks not only to protect the survival of our body but also our psychological identity (the way we see ourselves). The more we try to deceive our environment and ourselves about our capabilities and features, the more danger exists to be discovered , and the more we suffer more psychological stress and fear.
Therefore one of the best tools to reduce fear / stress is to be authentic. When we act in accordance with our deepest principles we create harmony in our minds. If we act against those ideas because we try to impress someone, try to hide or pretend something, it creates a mental conflict, a lack of consistency and if we believe in that illusion, then we create a constant fear of moments that uncover this self-deception and question our identity.
Being authentic means knowing yourself and your own needs and act on them. Act authentically requires a lot of courage because it means not to be what others want us to be, sometimes it means to disappoint someone or disagree with his opinion. You may even have to face more fears and other negative emotions at first, but long term we will feel more in peace with ourselves, more authentic and happier.
If you want to practice be more authentic, ask yourself this question as often as possible:
Am I acting in accordance with my needs and deepest convictions?
(Sometimes it is necessary to make clear what the convictions are and then to write them down)
Learning to be authentic is a process that can take many years or a lifetime. When you recognize that you act not in accordance with your needs and deepest convictions, do not judge yourself for it, Note that you are doing these work for your personal growth, which is very good and that small gains are much more important than small setbacks. The fears are gifts for life. You're working to feel good about yourself, to increase your self-esteem, for a full-filled and happier life.
The program can not replace individual therapy. If you feel that your emotions overcome or if you experience many negative thoughts please contact me or other professional of your choice.